hmm.. okay, i really cant forget this so just gonna write it down.. i really don get why some ppl can b such hypocrites.. firstly, i used to believe that, u noe, u cant date someone ur fren has dated and all.. but seriously.. think abt it.. in my side lar k.. she got him by stealing him away from another girl whom she take as her so-called pet sis? wth.. not say coupled with him fair and square and all.. so who is she to judge me?? nvm, then he broke up with her, yeah okay but guess why? coz she used him.. abused him.. hmm.. after afew months later, i went out for a date with him, actually didnt noe it was a date till he took my hand in the cinema.. lol wtf.. so okay fine, i felt guilty, and called his ex up.. and say everything straight that, i was oni dating him for fun, just a fling, and if she doesnt feel comfortable or didnt like it i will break it off coz im not exactly with him! and she said its okay.. hmm.. to me, she is the straight forward kind.. well, she can even call herself a bitch and she's pretty so wtf.. i was being straight forward, pls lar b straight forward too rite? hmm.. fine its hard to say no.. nvm, behind my back, say oh i will balas dendam.. wtf.. and well, she did.. one thing that will leave a scar for life.. she made all my frens turn their back on me, kicked me out of vb, made me feel like a fool, called her crying on the phone for advice when i didnt noe it was her that put me in this pain and oni get screwed by doing so.. quote, "i want u to learn!".. ?? omg.. nvm.. afew days ago, i just remembered something that she did to a fren she once said to us," i will only respect "...", and no one else.." in front of her other frens? no comment~ anyway, back to the story.. she called one of my girl- fren's gf out for a drink.. secretly..... =.=" and told that gf not to tell my fren.. and obviously, the gf did tell my fren abt it.. so.. conclusion, do u think this girl is really the victim? seriously.. hmm.. i really wonder..
i still do think wat i did was wrong.. but im not totally wrong.. seriously.. u can say im dumb, but seriously, i don think i was that wrong to deserve wat happened to me at all..
like one fren said, there's no right or wrong to this.. im neither right, nor im totally at wrong.. to ppl that noes me should noe this thing that happened, u mayb the one that joined up with her, coz there's quite afew of u.. =/ sadly.. but i will never put the blame on u.. i will only feel really disappointed and hurt, coz u have no idea wat happened and its none of ur fucking business to do such a thing to me? where were u when she did that fucked up thing to "..." ?? where? why only i get wat i so-called deserve?? huh?? tell me izzit fair? we were once all immature.. but that was really really low of u guys to do it.. i don mean to say this to get a simple sorrie.. just to let u guys noe, that it really hurt me deeply.. i still love u guys afterall we've been thru.. but if u still think im a bf stealer or watever fuckin shit u can come up with.. pls give it ur all.. coz seriously, i've hit bottom since that day, till i will not feel any more pain anymore.. thats how hurt i was, and i m.. i am sorrie that u have such a fren like me? coz u noe, im not perfect, not even close..
well, i noe this is the past and all, but its hard to forget.. i dont think any of u would understand, since u noe, u never experienced it b4.. and i can assure u.. i would rather build peace between us than to take any sides.. yes i've taken sides b4.. but seriously, im tired.. if u hate me, pls do.. but pls, don fake it infront of me.. i want real frens.. i noe i have my flaws.. and im sure u're aware that everyone has flaws.. i m willing to put them aside, and just b frens like we use to b.. its just all up to u..
this post is just something i needed to let out.. to anyone that i've hurt b4, or anyone that thinks im fucked up for writting this then.. its ur head, i cant do much abt it.. but to those that was involved, i really didnt write this to make u pissed.. its just something i hope u guys will understand.. eventho it happened such a long time ago.. its something i need to get it off my shoulder.. since, i didnt get to explain my part of the story in the past.. im not trying to prove anything.. like i said, i do think wat i did was wrong.. but wat u did, was just harsh and unreasonable.. plus, u guys were the ones who said that we will not bring any of our probs in the game and shit.. just bcoz of this, u left me alone.. and not to say u liked her.. =/ sorrie if "the girl" is reading this..
was i or m i so cruel?
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